Why is a rebound unhealthy for you?

A rebound relationship is one that occurs shortly after the break-up of a significant love relationship. If you are in a relationship but have distanced yourself emotionally from your partner, you may begin a rebound relationship before you even end the former relationship completely. If you move quickly from a long lasting relationship into another relationship then you are probably in a rebound relationship. A rebound relationship can work, but I feel like if it does it’s based on the wrong things. The purpose of a rebound relationship, in most cases is to make an ex jealous. If you want to hear the truth, rebound relationships usually never really work out. What is known as a rebound relationship could be an unfair and unhealthy way for you to move on in life. Let’s explore the seven reasons as to why:


1. It destroys all your chances of getting back with your ex

Your ex has feelings too. A breakup can help both parties to look inwards, analyse, and may envision a reunion. A rebound relationship is ought to put a full stop to all possible future relationships with your ex. They may have been doing well to sort out their feelings. A rebound relationship hammers the nail in the coffin and buries all the beautiful moments you might have spent together.


2. It damages your reputation

A rebound relationship does not help you protect your reputation, as people who are committed are often given more respect. By not heading towards a rebound relationship, you show strength of character and a desire to achieve something. Breakups are hard and everyone understands this, but you have to own up to the situation rather than jumping into another relationship instantly. People will take you less seriously when you will be known for getting into a string of relationships.


3. You’re looking for attention, not affection

Rebound relationships make us feel good because of the attention we receive by being in it, the same attention we stopped getting from our ex. We often fall back into old relationships because the feelings were already there before. There is an instant gratification in it, but you have to remember that it didn’t work for a reason. Perhaps the affection was not enough.


4. You are in a haze

After a breakup, you are in obscurity and a mess emotionally. A lot of thoughts run in your mind, and you are not your real self. Rushing into another relationship will not help you catch the eye of the person you should really be interested in. You need to be organised before deciding to be with someone, as this helps the other person see you for who you actually are.

Most times people do not want to face the reality of going through a breakup. They want to get into a rebound relationship to overcome the fear of loneliness. The best way to deal with a breakup is to do what it entails to get over it. Talk to your friends, family or a therapist. You could also write, and vent your emotions through such mediums. You should take good care of yourself and, with time, you will be ready to take on a new relationship.


5. It makes your current partner feel inadequate

If you’re transparent about your last relationship with your new partner, it’s natural for them to compare themselves to your ex. If it was a long relationship, they will question what exactly went wrong and worry how at any moment you might change your mind. They will also question your intentions. What are you doing in a new relationship so soon? You may ask yourself the same question as well.


6. You’re Not Leaving Space for Anyone Else

If you have an understudy in place, chances are you’ll miss out on spotting your lead role. You may think you’ll be able to spot a potential partner while hanging out with your filler, but chances are you’ll be pretty consumed.

Think about it. If you have someone filling the temporary position then you’re less likely to put yourself out there, attending social events where you can meet a potential date. After all, your rebound offers you a false sense of security that allows you to play safe. Does anything great ever come out of playing it safe?


7. It is a distraction that will pass

“When I rebounded with one of my old exes, it wasn’t because I had missed him. I just needed a distraction from the mess I had become after my more recent breakup. It worked for a little while; but eventually I realized that dating an old ex wasn’t healing my new pain. I ended up breaking his heart for the second time.

When we rebound, we only think about ourselves. We need to remember that there’s another person in the equation. We need to take things slower and be more cautious of all the hearts involved.” It is advisable to take at least a 4 month break between stepping into a new relationship after one.

-Harkamal Kaur